Overcoming a Lack of Confidence {The Atlanta Journal-Constitution}

Confidence is an anchor for the heart. It separates those who only dream from those who accomplish great things. It is a crucial element of personal fulfillment, focus, and joy.

Confidence anchors our hearts when doubts assail us and pushes us toward the next step when everything around us pulls us back. It helps us overcome hurdles, dismiss nay-sayers, and look at the mirror with a smile on our faces.

Indeed, confidence is arguably the one ingredient mixed into every success story. And yet, studies show there is a confidence crisis permeating society these days. This predicament certainly affects men, but there is no doubt that women suffer from a lack of confidence at higher degrees.

Women experience higher levels of anxiety and self-doubt. They are harsher on themselves than men and often develop low self-esteem early in life.

The issue has become ever more significant in the last two decades, as social media has created a new level of comparison.

I was a teenager in the 80s when beauty standards were primarily established by healthy-looking models like Cindy Crawford and Elle Macpherson. Moreover, girls would not compare themselves to them unless they opened a magazine or watched a movie.

Conversely, my daughters’ generation spends hours glued to their phones, where impossible beauty standards and low moral values shoot arrows at their confidence, breeding a generation of young women and men who struggle to believe they can ever measure up.

The issue is as insidious as it is dangerous: As we increasingly focus on what others think we should be or do, we drift farther away from who God created us to become. We write our names on impossible measuring sticks instead of fixing our hearts on the fact that we were, as King David said in Psalm 139, “beautifully and wonderfully made.”

A couple of months ago, I interviewed a young woman for my podcast who traveled the road from self-doubt and insecurity to solid confidence.

Amanda Pittman is an up-and-coming speaker, author, and business leader, whose mission is to help women find their way out of a life of crippling insecurity to one of confidence and strong faith.

In her new book, Stand In Confidence, Pittman recounts her journey from an unhealthy relationship that bred crushing insecurity and low self-worth to rising in her God-given identity to a thriving life as a wife, mother, and businesswoman.

Pittman shares four components of confidence – the first of which undoubtedly establishes the focal point for anyone who struggles to walk towards success confidently: Clarity.

Indeed, when it comes to God’s people, I agree with Pittman that a lack of clarity about how He sees us is one of the main reasons people struggle with a lack of confidence or become paralyzed from moving forward by faith. Pittman writes: “The more clarity you have about who you are, why you’re here, and what you’re designed to do, the more confident you’ll be.”

I could not agree more. A confidence crisis usually follows a lack of understanding that God created us for a purpose, for such a time as this, and with a unique design.

People who know who they are and have clarity about their strengths take other people’s opinions with a grain of salt and do not allow others to undermine their trust in who God says they are.

At the end of the day, if you are struggling with a lack of confidence, it could be because your focus is on how others see you or on negative messages ingrained in you. Maybe your biggest enemy is a lack of clarity on how God sees you. You are unique. Precious. The apple of His eye. The One who spoke the stars into existence thinks that much of you.

Anchoring your heart to this truth may just be the first step to overcoming self-doubt and fear and help you to step into your unique destiny confidently.

“Blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him.” Prophet Jeremiah

Find out more about Amanda Pittman at amandaapittman.com. Listen to the interview on the podcast God-Sized Stories with Patricia Holbrook. Link below.

This article was initially published in Patricia’s column for The Atlanta Journal-Constitution on Saturday, October 8, 2022. Click HERE To find it on the AJC’s website.