I had not seen her in three years. As I walked into Starbucks to write that morning, I saw her smiling face through the glass windows. We sat down, catching up on three years of family and work history. I was surprised to find out that her son is now a teenager. It seems as if he was in elementary school just the other day.
As we talked about our children, she shared some of her teen’s struggles with his faith and how she felt like God was stretching her faith.
“Lord, you take care of me, and I take care of them!” she said.
We both burst out laughing, amused by the truth behind the joke.
We were talking about how hard it is for us, moms, to relinquish our children’s care to God, unreservedly. Indeed, our tendency is to pray… and then worry. And invariably, pick up our children back from the altar of surrender, in an attempt to solve their problems ourselves. We can’t stand the thought of Junior hurting.
What if God allows them to make bad choices? What if the only way their character can be molded is through pain and suffering?
Oh, no, Lord. Not that, please!
Yet, if we believe that God indeed works everything together for our good… and His glory (Romans 8:28), then why do we fret? Can we not look back and realize that we have matured and grown spiritually with our past mistakes? Can we not remember that our bad choices broke us over and over again; making us run to Him who mends the shattered hearts?
Is it really so bad that our teenager or young adult child questions God? Wouldn’t we rather them question Him, prove Him faithful, thus finding Jesus as the only Way, Truth and Life… on their own?
[bctt tweet=”Is it really so bad that our teenager or young adult child questions God? Wouldn’t we rather them question Him, prove Him faithful, thus finding Jesus as the only Way, Truth and Life… on their own? #MondayMotivation #MondayDevotional” username=”PatHolbrook”]
I personally want my babies to love Jesus because they have experienced Him as their faithful and true friend, not because I told them to. Unfortunately, I also know that they’ll probably have to suffer before their love for the Master is perfected.
[bctt tweet=”I personally want my babies to love Jesus because they have experienced Him as their faithful and true friend, not because I told them to. #MondayMotivation #MondayDevotional” username=”PatHolbrook”]After all, how will they know His heart without proving Him?
And how will they prove Him if they don’t feel they need Him?
And how will they feel they need Him without pain?
Still… this momma’s heart cringes to think of letting them go…
Meanwhile, God whispers:
“Have I not made them? Knit each one of their cells in your womb?”
“Do I not love them more than you do?”
Do.You.Trust.ME?
“He said, “Do not stretch out your hand against the lad, and do nothing to him; for now I know that you fear God, since you have not withheld your son, your only son, from Me.” Genesis 22:12
It may just be that your call today is similar to Abraham’s, who was asked to bring his only promised son to the altar of sacrifice. The heart of the story was never about Isaac’s life. It was about Abraham’s heart. Likewise, the trials our children go through bring forth an awesome opportunity for our spiritual growth as parents.
You see, in the process of working on our children, God works on us as well: Shaping our prayer life. Strengthening our testimony. Reminding us of His faithfulness. Keeping us dependent upon Him. Teaching us real TRUST, as we bring our most precious possessions to the altar of sacrifice, as if to say: They are yours anyway, Lord.
These are all good things.
They’re the good that is birthed out of the bad: Closeness to Yahweh. Deeper love. Genuine Trust.
So here is a challenge, my friend:
If your child or anyone else in your life is wandering away from the Master, will you bring him or her to the altar of sacrifice today? Will you choose to trust that the same God who asks you to cease striving and surrender them to Him, will certainly provide the ram for the sacrifice?
[bctt tweet=”If your child or anyone else in your life is wandering away from the Master, will you bring him or her to the altar of sacrifice today? Will you choose to trust that the same God who asks you to cease striving and surrender them to Him, will certainly provide the ram for the sacrifice?” username=”PatHolbrook”]
Because just as He did for Abraham, He wants to bless you beyond measure for your faith.
So why don’t we join in prayer, hands held up to Heaven in surrender, calling upon our children’s Maker today:
YOU take care of them, Lord. They’re not mine, anyway.
I.Trust.YOU.
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Patricia,
Sadly, my son had to walk a prodigal path and get to the point that He really NEEDED God. We don’t want our children to experience pain, but sometimes it is the only thing that will draw them into an intimate relationship with their Heavenly Father.
Blessings,
Bev xx
As hard as it must have been, praise God that He found His faithful Father with open arms. What a wonderful testimony of God’s faithfulness.
May God continue to lead Him!
Blessings, dear friend!
Another mom once testified hat it’s one thing to trust God for ourselves; it’s another thing to trust God for our children’s needs. Yet that’s what we have to do. He loves them even more than we do and wants their best and is the only One who can bring it about. It’s hard to watch them question and wrestle, yet that’s part of their faith becoming their own. I’ve been praying that my children wouldn’t just be part of the Christian culture they grew up in, but that they would have their own strong, deep relationship with God. I hold on tight to Philippians 1:6: “And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.”
Hi, Barbara!
I love this: ” I’ve been praying that my children wouldn’t just be part of the Christian culture they grew up in, but that they would have their own strong, deep relationship with God. ” That is the desire of my hear too… that’s the only way to true faith!
Blessings to you!!
This is such a valuable truth. And yet it feels so very hard! I know that God longs for that personal relationship with my kids, so I need to relinquish control for their sake. Thank you for reminded me today!
You are so welcome, Rebecca! It’s possibly one of the hardest exercises of releasing control to God… and a huge test of faith!
So glad you joined us! Blessings to you,
This is one of the hardest parts of parenting to me. Trusting God completely with our children is the safest place to be, yet it often feels counterintuitive. Thanks for stretching us to have more faith in God instead of in our own abilities.
You are so right, Lisa! It is hard, and yet, it is certainly a way to strengthen our faith and prayer life.
Blessings to you!
Hi Patricia! Thank you for this post. It speaks volumes of truth to my heart in my current parenting season. Blessings to you!
That is awesome, Joy! To God be the glory!
Always a blessing to have you in our linkup!
This is a tough one, and yet we hold onto God’s promises and open our hands. Thank you for words that calm our parental hearts. It’s our nature to desire a level of orthodoxy in our kids that we certainly did not possess ourselves when we were their age. May we find grace to walk the rough road of faith alongside our growing up kids and to do it with peace and joy.
I love this in your comment: “It’s our nature to desire a level of orthodoxy in our kids that we certainly did not possess ourselves when we were their age.” Perhaps it’s because I did not come to Christ until I was 25, but I often think about how much my sin and mistakes drew me to the Father as a way to understand that God will be faithful with my children as well.
It’s always a pleasure to have you in our linkup, Michelle!
“You see, in the process of working on our children, God works on us as well.” What insight. Perhaps, He’s waiting on us to trust. Wonderful post, Patricia!
Thank you, dear friend! I believe our children’s struggles certainly present a way to keep us on our knees, right? 🙂
love to you!
Thanks for sharing this today. As a mother of young adults, I now find this the hardest part of parenting.I hold on to Romans 8:28 fiercely for my own life, yet somehow forgot to claim it for my children’s lives as well!
Amen, Jerralea!
I did not become a Christina until I was 25… I often think about the MANY mistakes I made, and how God, in His mercy, has somehow made each one of them to work for my good and His glory, especially as I minister to others. He does not waste our pain… or sin, for that matter. We must claim that is going to happen in our children’s lives as well. WE, mommas, just need to keep on our knees!’
Blessings!!
Such a great perspective, Patricia. My older daughter is a senior in high school, and the future looms large. When I’m tempted to fret about all the things she has yet to learn, the rough edges that still need smoothing, the faith that is still growing, I try to remember when I’ve grown the most in my own life. It’s exactly as you say, through the trials and hard times. All as an adult. It’s a constant process of letting go, isn’t it? Into the hands our perfect heavenly Father. 🙂
Hi, Lois!
You and I have that in common: my oldest is also a senior in high school. As I look ahead, my heart fills with excitement and also concerns… but I fell challenged to trust that the God who led her so far will remain close to her. My greatest advice to her is to never stop spending time in Scripture and prayer… otherwise, it’s easy to fall prey to the enemy’s schemes. So far, so good, but, oh, I certainly know that the big challenges have not truly begun yet!
Blessings to you and your daughter in this important time of her life!
So hard but such a good reminder for me with my teen. laurensparks.net
Thank you, Lauren! Many blessings to you as you walk this road of mothering a teenager. It’s hard work, but so worth it!
Beautiful Patricia! This is hard for us mamas…to really let go and not hang on so tight it leaves no room for God to work and move in our kids lives. And I agree, I would rather my kids question God, then conclude He IS God and a faithful Father than take my word for it and miss Him altogether!
It’s indeed hard to let go of our children and entrust them to the Father’s care when their faith starts wavering. But it’s just another (huge) test of our faith!
Love to you, my friend!