Sometimes our motives are obvious. Other times, we have ulterior motives guiding us, affecting our decision-making and discernment.
For me, guilt is often an ulterior motive. Back in school, every time the teacher reprimanded the whole class for bad behavior instead of singling someone out, I was sure it was all my fault. Even now, if someone on a work team seems less than thrilled with an outcome, I’m instantly guilty.
My guilt has had a way of guiding me into people-pleasing and letting others take advantage of me for a long time. When pressed, I tend to insist it isn’t guilt, but that I just love helping. As a result, I’m easily beholden, serving with impure motives, deceived by my own heart.
Paul prayed this for believers:
“That your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless” –Ph 1:9-10
“Living as a slave of men” can easily be my pattern. To fight this battle, it helps to be able to recognize my own motives.
Someone wise offered me this mechanism for helping discern my true (ulterior) motives:
If this (___________________________) is my motive, then what if (_________________________) isn’t part of the equation?
Perhaps this little mechanism will help you discern where ulterior motives tend to lead you astray, too. Here’s an example.
Step 1:
If you desire to go on a missions trip but aren’t sure if your motives are pure, think of godly motives to fill in the first blank:
-Setting aside time specifically to serve
-Rendering a service to someone who needs it
-Reflecting Christ while offering a service
Step 2:
For the second half of the mechanism, think of worldly desires that could distort your godly motives:
-Getting to take an exotic trip while looking righteous
-Building up an ego or a reputation for selfish gain
-Feeling like a savior or hero as mission recipients gives you thanks
Step 3:
Using the first examples from the lists, you might ask:
If this (setting aside time to serve others in the name of Jesus) is my motive, then what if (traveling to an exotic place) isn’t part of the equation?
Will you still take time to serve? Will you still see serving others in Jesus’ name as what you need to do with that time? What changes?
Your answers to this kind of question tend to reveal what you’re really motivated by. That’s helpful for gaining “depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best.” (Ph 1:9-10)
If your motives are revealed as impure it may indicate that a particular course of action isn’t God-led. Sometimes though, God wants to purify our motives first but still asks us to do what we were considering after all.
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When our motives are pure, we can be “filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God.” (Ph 1:11)
It’s worth uncovering our ulterior motives so that we can rightly praise and glorify God!
{A version of this post was previously published here}
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Thank you, Bethany, for this sifting equation. I have the same knee jerk response to guilt!
Glad to be here with you this week, Michele! Isn’t it wild how similar guilt and conviction can feel?
That question is a helpful one. I agree, sometimes we’re still supposed to do a thing, but we need to purify our motives first. Sometimes it’s a continuous battle.
It can definitely be a continuous battle! Praise God he helps us. Thanks for joining in today!
I like this framework. Uncovering our deepest motivations isn’t easy, and it’s not something we even think about doing very often. But it’s so important. Knowing our “why” can affect our “what.” Thanks, Bethany.
Knowing out why so affects our what- thanks for summing you it so well Lisa! Glad to meet with you here today!
What a great way to put things in perspective! Thanks for the encouragement, Bethany!
Thank you, Becky! Glad to see you here!
Bethany, I’ve never seen this equation before. I like the way it helps us clarify our motivations to discern God’s will.
I am grateful someone introduced me to it, I’ve found it very helpful! Glad to see you here today!
I love this equation to help reveal our inner motives! Just asking the questions also reveals that we do want to be following God’s way in our minds and heart, and with our actions. I can imagine God is pleased with us when we take the time to seek Him first before all we do!
That’s such a great point, that asking this shows we want to do rightly but God and are willing to be corrected. Praise God! Thanks for joining in!
Although I have definitely been aware at times of impure motives on my part, I have never thought about examining for this on the regular!
I often forget to examine my own heart for false motives! So grateful God helps us to do that! Glad to see you here today!
I love spiritual math, Bethany! Your equation makes so much sense when it comes to figuring out our true motivations. And I love how you allow for the fact that God might still want us to proceed, once our motives our pure.
Thanks Lois! Ironically, I hate normal math lol! But this kind helps. Glad to see you here today friend!
Hi Bethany.
I really had to think through this process. What a great framework to use in considering decisions we’re making!
Many blessings,
Tammy
Thanks Tammy! I really have to think this one through often too. Glad to see you here today!